People Watching Episode 2: Voters

Hi folks. Today in America, we vote! Here is a chilling fact that I cannot wrap my head around:

Both Obama and Romney each raised well over 800 million dollars for their campaign. The sad part is, one of these dudes is gonna loose, and that’s over 800 million dollars that was wasted. What can we even do with that much money?

We can buy every American an ice cream cone!

We can pay off 20,000 student loan debts of $40,000 or less (We could probably create the same amount of jobs…)

We could pay over 1 million people’s rent this month.

We could hire 8 million people to kick Michelle Bachman in the face for 100 dollars a pop. Or! Everyone in America could do it for about 2 dollars a pop.

We could feed some starving kids.

We could pay off a puny portion of the national debt.

Save jillions of feral kitties and doggies and build huge fun house complexes for them.

Which loser am I going to vote for? Jill Stein of course! I just can’t bring myself to vote for someone I don’t agree with. Its not like my vote counts anyway no matter who I vote for.

What else could we do with 800 million dollars?

http://elections.nytimes.com/2012/campaign-finance

Savings 101: The Stripper Cash Wad.

Money saving is held dear to my heart because I am deathly afraid of inflation. I understand that I will probably never come close to owning the fancy things my parents did (Nice house, cabin, sappy daughter who went to college) With the way inflation seems to be going, I may own a small house or a cabin with no plumbing, or perhaps a nice waterproof tent.

However, things could work themselves out since I am not in debt and have no student loans. If I spend/save wisely I should be fine, right?!?!

Well, I don’t know the answer to that since I am just a fresh faced 22 year old with the sun shining out of my bum. BUT! I am going to share a savings technique with you that will put all of my frugal jewish friends to shame. I call it: My big fat stripper wad of cash.

Step 1: only use cash when buying ANYTHING and everything. I only make two exceptions: 1. the gas pump. I hate paying inside only to find I have a 7/8ths full tank. 2. The grocery store. (simply because I hate fumbling around with cash while I watch my english muffin bread get smashed by the onslaught of lean cuisines and my gallon bucket of ice cream that come roaring down the conveyor belt)

Step 2: When using cash, every time you get 1$’s you must filter them out and put them into… A GIGANTIC WAD OF 1′s. You know, like that strippers have at the end of a night of butt bouncing. Do not spend these $1′s if you have them on you. Spend a five or ten instead. Whats that? You ran out of a money? Then maybe you should have been spending a little more wisely instead of being tricked into some 2 for 1 deodorant deal where the deodorants turned out to be little travel sized punks.

Step 3: watch the wad grow. After Starting one at the beginning of June, I now have 127$ chilling in a big fat wad. More money if you count all the loose change I also refuse to spend. I’ve also found that this method makes me spend more wisely. Who knew.

How fast can your stripper wad grow? How many days does it take you to accumulate 100$ in George Washingtons?